There's an old saying that goes a little something like "just because you can doesn't mean you should" and no better phrase sums up getting back in bed with your ex. If you had a great sexual relationship it seems a shame that even though you couldn't make it as partners that you should give up fucking altogether. After all good sex is good sex and often hard to find. So what are some of the reasons we can't seem to leave our exs alone and why is it a good idea to discontinue a sexual relationship?
Sexual attraction and exes
You know how it feels, a simple touch can be electrifying.
Remember your ex from college, the same one who makes your dick jump even now?
Imagine you bump into the same person tonight.
What do you do after you say hello, hug and grab a drink?
Would you be able to resist having sex with an ex, if there’s no one to hold you back?
Having sex with an ex
Straight from the horse’s mouth, try to avoid having sex with an ex unless it’s inevitable.
It’s hard enough to stay friends after a break up. It’s not worth it to jeopardize a good memory on something like a hook-up. Hook-ups tend to mess your relationships a lot more, and it can also hold you back from getting involved with other new and more meaningful relationships.
The issue can get a lot worse if you’re already in love with someone else. If an ex isn’t worth dating and this new love interest is, then why keep falling for the lusty fling of an ex?
Having an affair with an ex
When you break up with someone, you’re trying to take a step forward and move on in life. Trying to have a have sex with an ex is very easy, but it’s also madness.
Not only would it make you feel guilty, it can also confuse you. On one hand, you’d think about an ex with whom the sex felt so good it makes you wanna cry. On the other, you have a new lover who is deeply in love with you, but somehow, the routine sex is a wee bit less fascinating.
If you really want to have sex with an ex, do it if you’re certain there’s no interest in anything beyond sex. It’s not ethical, but it’s the hair of the horny dog.
Many believe it’s acceptable when you’re desperate for sex, when you really don’t care for that person anymore emotionally or otherwise. If that’s the case, call your ex and try hooking up, but never make it a regular routine. And don’t have sex with your ex if you’re seeing someone else. It’s never really worth it. And you’d realize how stupid you’ve been the second both of you have messed up your sheets.
When is having sex with an ex a good thing?
Having sex with an ex is a good thing if you are single, and so is your ex. It can give you the much needed break from sexual frustrations. And it makes things easier.
Hooking up with someone new just for recreational values can be quite long and winding. But with an ex, both of you know exactly what the other person wants, and you can skip the part where you run around trees and get straight to bed.
Sex with an ex is like getting intimate with someone you know and trust, and they can provide the perfect mix of pleasure and security. You’re not treading on any new ground, you know what to expect, and you like that.
When is having sex with an ex not a good thing?
If you must really know the truth, having sex with an ex rarely ends up as sweet and enjoyable as you think. It may just be the chemicals in our bodies, or something deeper, but almost always, an attachment is formed with an ex after sex, where you’d be left with mixed feelings.
One part of you would just want to fall in love with your ex again, while the other part knows the relationship can’t really last. Mostly, at some point, you’d have to choose between your ex and your present amore, or you may just end up having an affair.
I hope you do remember this is your ex we’re talking about. There’s a reason the relationship didn’t work out the first time around.
It takes a certain amount of control to judge a sex buddy a.k.a. ex lover as something purely physical and nothing more. An occasional hook up now and then has every chance of blooming into a passionate relationship. And let’s face it, do you really think you can survive the romance together with all the differences coming up all over again?
Are you fucking or falling in love?
It’s not easy to leave emotions out of the picture. You may think you’re totally detached, but walking out of your ex’s bedroom wouldn’t be easy. Feelings and hopes of a second chance start springing up now and then, and with each round of good sex, you can’t help but think “hey, the sex is awesome, should I give this relationship another go?”
Are both of you surely out of love? Fat chances are, one of you may still be in love with other, and keep it a secret.
This is especially true in recent break ups where one partner is ready to accept anything just to have more contact with the ex. This sort of a relationship is the worst, because everything starts to spiral around lust and love, and it tends to get nasty when one of you wants out. Even otherwise, old wounds open up, and very soon, both of you would be left wondering “are we having a fling or have we got back together?!”
So Smash or Naw?
Remember, having sex with an ex is great, but as with everything else that’s exceptionally good, there are several snappy reactions that can come into the picture.
As tempting as it can be, focus on why you broke up with your ex in the first place. And if you have to be friends, try not to think of them as moving sex toys. It may feel nice at first, but it only takes a few passionate nights together in bed to bring back the old memories of a love that never was, and a few more nights of carnal abuse to mess your world up.
So have sex with an ex if you think you’ve got nothing to lose. But otherwise, keep your privates as far away from each other as possible.